Close Please enter your Username and Password
Reset Password
If you've forgotten your password, you can enter your email address below. An email will then be sent with a link to set up a new password.
Cancel
Reset Link Sent
Password reset link sent to
Check your email and enter the confirmation code:
Don't see the email?
  • Resend Confirmation Link
  • Start Over
Close
If you have any questions, please contact Customer Service

My Blog

Welcome to my blog!

Fairytale love
Posted:Oct 1, 2023 7:41 pm
Last Updated:Jan 24, 2024 7:58 pm
901 Views

My idea of a fairytale is... well it's mine.
A shy overwhelmed maiden, a strong leading man who knows what he wants. And he wants her, he wants me. He sees through the forest for the trees, and he loves what he sees. He loves it so much that he needs it, it is more important than anything, and he'll do anything necessary to get it. He knows the maiden, knows she'll be too afraid to take the leap. So through a poisoned apple, a drink with an added kick, or a perfumated napkin he makes the leap for her. While she's in her slumber he holds her close to him thinking about how beautiful she is, how sweet, his good girl. He'll do anything to keep her safe even from herself.
He brings her back to the castle, in the land of far far away, no one close enough to bother the soulmates. He prepared all her favorites for her arrival, dvd's of Over the Garden Wall, smutty books like Consequences by Aletha Roming, Catcher In the Rye. He made a home, soft blankets, fuzzy rugs, everything they could ever need. He places his princess on the bed, tucks her in and sits down in the chair next to the bed to watch over her until she's ready.
When she wakes up she's first overwhelmed by the loving feeling surrounding her. But that only lasts a second until she comes to. With blood pounding in her ears she runs to the door or at least she tries to. He steps in, so much faster, so much bigger, so much stronger and yet he doesnt hurt her. Instead he caresses her face. And when she starts to cry he kisses the tears away. Her entire being is at war with itself. She is logically terrified and yet emotionally she feels more at peace than ever before. She's frozen. He takes her into his arms, whispering sweet nothings into her ears while he carries her back to bed. When she finally stops crying he gets up and leaves locking the door behind him. She knows she should get up and look for an exit, scream for help, do something, do anything! But she's so tired
He comes back with breakfast only to find his sweet angel passed out in bed. He knows he has to be patient, that he can't overwhelm her, that they have the rest of their lives ahead of them but he can't help himself. He cuddles up against her and wraps her in his arms and whispers "fuck baby girl, daddys gonna take such good care of you. I know I have to show you but we are going to be perfect together I promise. I am never letting you go. Okay, sweetie? your mine, forever and always. and i'm yours, i'm all yours baby"
2 Comments
Age Gaps? (mostly)
Posted:Jan 23, 2023 3:39 pm
Last Updated:Nov 28, 2023 6:14 pm
2467 Views

Can anything good come from a relationship at my age. I understand growth comes from mistakes and learning and that will come from relationships at my age. But I kindof wonder about the people who are intrested in me. To start it is only ever online, idk I guess in person I have a really good invisblity cloak. And they are usually older then me. I am not someone who is by any means against age gaps in fact all of my "relationships" have been age gaps. But I also look really young like people have thought I'm 12 or 10 in person though usually its something like 16. I also don't come off that stable and healthy though I guess that can be considerded heart on my sleeve honestly. And going back to growth coming from being in relationships then I'm basically a 5 year old in a relationship when it comes to in person stuff and a 9 year old when it comes to the amount of time I've done online relationships. I guess its weird when I was younger I knew anyone older then 18 who liked me was a bad person now I still feel like I'm the same age but things arent as black and white. The majority of my immediate family finds age gaps in relationships to be immoral, creepy, and abusive. My therapist (who looks at it through a research perspective) believes age gaps are okay between older people but detrimental to younger people such as myself. I don't know what the truth is. It is entirely possible that I am only so pro age gaps because I'm defense since I've been in them for the past 4 years and don't want to have to look at myself as a victim. I know this is a biased place to ask but what is your open on age gaps? And what age do they become ok at, do you look at legality and if so if you visited a country where the age of consent was 14 (which is many countries western ones included) would you follow that or do you follow personal morality (for instance 25 or older because the brain on average becomes fully developed at 24 for girls and 25 for guys)?
9 Comments
The reality
Posted:May 25, 2022 6:33 pm
Last Updated:Nov 28, 2023 6:14 pm
2791 Views

I often try to avoid this reality but after a series of events the idea has sunk into my brain and become unwaivarble. Alot if not all of my kinks involve being forced by some so in love with me that they just can't control themselves. They would kidnap me, lock me up treat me like apple of their eye. They might hurt me, something I could forgive because afterward they would caress the bruises and care for me. The person would love me so intensly that it would cause them to do bad things but at the center of the bad would be love. The relationship would be destructive and lean more towards abusive than bdsm or kinky. But for many reasons, one of which being that I don't really see any other path for myself being loved, its all I want. However the reality is no matter what I've told myself in the past a relationship like this is bad, that of course is obvious to most but denial isn't just a river. The first reality of the issue with such a tense love like this is that it might fade. The reason I want this type of love so strongly ,with all of my soul at some points, is because I believed it would allow me to breathe. There would be no question if the person I was with really loved me or not, I'd have the bruises and chains to prove it. But it wouldnt last or to say it in a way a future me would find more truthful it is possible that it wouldn't last. In the audio porns and literotica stories I throw myself into it is always an older man who suddenly becomes obsessed with a doe eyed girl with flowing locs and hazel eyes (why are the eyes so often hazel). A virgin who is timid and shy. And while most of that might apply to me right now it won't always. I will age and our society doesn't nessarily like that. And when I age all, or atleast alot, that made the obsessive love obsessive will fade, and so I will fade in their hearts. There will be other pretty naivie girls like I was and I'll end up abandonned and alone like I always feared. The other reason why a relationship like this is bad/ wouldnt work out is because for many people I never would have been doe eyed girl with flowing lovs and hazel eyes. My hair doesnt flow nor is it long, my eyes are brown not hazel. I'm not white and so I am Prissy not Scarlet O'Hare. I don't get the ballgowns and love I get slapped and ignored. I know some people get annoyed when I bring up race issues so I usually dont but I have to remind myself, there are no promises. For a good part of the day I've been imagining that I get cloroformed by a stalker and kidnapped. Everything I've wanted, right. But once I get to my new home I'm not the one he cares about. I'm not the apple of his eye. I'm a servant he might fuck if he so pleasesbut afterward I am disgarded like a used tissue. I am nothing to him. In that situation I'm trapped in a nightmare, a loveless soulcrushing nightmare with a constant reminder of the love I wanted.
Anyway that's just a theory a game theory.
Also I don't know if this will change what I think past today its just been echoing in my head over and over again so I thought to write it down sending it to a bunch of people might be premature but.. i don't have a but i'm just doing it i guess. sorry.
4 Comments
Our Life
Posted:May 23, 2022 5:56 pm
Last Updated:Nov 28, 2023 6:15 pm
2997 Views

I slowly become conscious. I feel funny kindof heavy. I open my eyelids and I look up and see you. My face wrinkles up as I try to squirm away. You smile down at me and say "Good Morning Sunny". Before I can ask where I am you push yourself into me. And just like that my virginity is taken. You start going faster and faster and despite myself a moan comes out. My eyes want to roll back but I try to keep them open so I can look at you. You look so primal its hard to imagine you in daily life. Suddenly I realize that I don't know you. I start to panic but the mix of the fuziness in my head and having you fuck me makes it hard to hold on to a thought. I manage to put together "...who are you" in between gasps and moans. You laugh and respond "your soulmate" then put your strong hands around my neck until I pass out.
6 Comments

To link to this blog (sunnyisme) use [blog sunnyisme] in your messages.