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aliljaded 53F
23925 posts
5/16/2022 12:50 am
On guilt and the right to choose

In their search and explorations, a submissive is often told she is depraved, sick, or has a twisted mind. Sadly, the last thing she needed to hear, because more often than not that is exactly what she’s been telling herself all along. That submission is wrong.

But it’s not. This is not a ‘disorder’, a sick, depraved mind, but simply a human being who is wired differently from the norm. Why not see this submissive as simply a selfless, giving human being who needs someone to receive her gift?

It is perhaps easier to understand a man’s need to dominate a woman than it is to understand a woman’s need to serve. After all, we’ve been fighting for women’s rights for centuries.

But this is the ultimate in women’s rights. Just like a woman is entitled to say no, she is also entitled to surrender her choices to another, voluntarily. It’s the freedom to choose, which allows me to serve another’s need above my own.

And it is that same right, that same hard-fought freedom that allows me to choose his bonds, his dominion, as my home. And my choice to fulfill this need to please, always.

.

©words: cat / be-pleasing-always


"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


tinkerfun 46F
11150 posts
5/29/2022 2:13 am

Great post!

Many years ago my dom has this thing that he wanted to ‘treat’ me because I so ‘bad’ and deprived. He would need to try to purify me (all the while knowing that he would fail). I sort of got it…

It was only a long time after that I could tell him that I didn’t actually really like it so much as I felt my sluttiness, willingness to be a submissive etc should be celebrated. That sort of setting that I would need to be treated/ cured kind of made me feel that there was something wrong with me. Whereas I knew there wasn’t.

You might understand this?

I think that’s why I never liked being made to feel worthless. It just wasn’t what made me tick.

As a Domme I can find it hard to humiliate men as I never liked it myself. Having said that I’ve become better at it if I know it’s something they desire and as a Domme I am more distant than I would have liked my dom to be.

Reading minx’s recent post made me realise that as a Domme I find it easy to get into the mindset of ‘female supremacy’ whereas as sub I needed more an admiring gentle dom.


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:40 am

Thanks, John.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:40 am

    Quoting Incognitomaster:
    what an interesting post! I actually never wondered how it might feel for a submissive to discover that they are not following societies expectations of a progressive feminist in their personal life choices (though I guess many would still support them on the global level? Would they? )

    I will be more aware of those struggles in the future, thanks for waking up my attention.
I would.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:38 am

    Quoting ridermantel:
    "a human being who is wired differently from the norm" Why has this become such an issue as of late? We were beginning to accept many things out of the norm. Now it is turning around and yet we can't even define the norm. Many posts have been rejected without a true explanation. So I ask why? Very good blogs are being virtually abandoned. It make me question a lot of things.
I'm not sure what the answer to that question is, Rider.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:35 am

    Quoting rondiri:
    so true. I've chatted with a few novice sub/slaves who feel guilt for how they feel, usually because of their upbringing. I always tell them they have nothing to feel guilty about, they are not abnormal. They need support not ridicule.
I agree with you wholeheartedly.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:34 am

Thank you.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:30 am

I thought so too, D.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/20/2022 3:28 am

    Quoting sletje1999:
    I wholeheartedly agree. I discovered my leaning at a fairly early age, pretty much as soon as I had been getting sexually aware. And it was a very contradictory discovery. On one side it felt good to indulge into the fantasy of being tied up naked and exposed, on the other side it felt completely wrong. I was convinced to be somehow sick and distorted for having such feelings.
    And it is not a topic you would just go and talk about with your parents, no matter how tolerant and open minded they are, which I have to say mine are at least to some extend. It took quite a bit of time to realize that it wasn't just me and that there were ways to live it without being condemned to hell for eternity. I also had the luck to meet someone who was neither trying to exploit it nor condemn it, but with whom I was instead able to openly and honestly discuss it. That it eventually turned into exploring it with him too, was fairly unavoidable but also a very good experience.
Thank you for sharing your experience here. I appreciate it.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/17/2022 3:54 am

    Quoting hardtop4you:
    The true souls among us
    know that we didn't choose
    this way, off the beaten path,
    it choose us. It doesn't define
    you absolutely, but it is absolute.
    A submissive will is not a gift or
    a weakness as a dominant will is
    not a strength or entitlement . .
    They are our calling. The essence
    of what we are in the deepest part
    of our soul. You don't have to be
    righteous, but you have to fulfill
    your own calling.
You are absolutely correct. (Again)

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/17/2022 3:52 am

    Quoting palinax:
    Absolutely right. Submission is a truly wonderful thing
Yes, it truly is.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/17/2022 3:52 am

    Quoting Tckg12:
    you are so right but the same is true for a male submissive too
Absolutely!

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/17/2022 3:51 am

Thank you.

"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”


JohnnyLightning 65M  
9506 posts
5/16/2022 10:54 pm

Nice post.

Howling at the moon and mal ad osteo.


Incognitomaster 52M
717 posts
5/16/2022 4:55 pm

what an interesting post! I actually never wondered how it might feel for a submissive to discover that they are not following societies expectations of a progressive feminist in their personal life choices (though I guess many would still support them on the global level? Would they? )

I will be more aware of those struggles in the future, thanks for waking up my attention.

When you come to a fork in the road, take it.

__Yogi Berra


ridermantel 68M

5/16/2022 9:59 am

"a human being who is wired differently from the norm" Why has this become such an issue as of late? We were beginning to accept many things out of the norm. Now it is turning around and yet we can't even define the norm. Many posts have been rejected without a true explanation. So I ask why? Very good blogs are being virtually abandoned. It make me question a lot of things.


Will35 60M
385 posts
5/16/2022 9:24 am

Agreed. And not letting a submissive make their own choice - whether to be submissive or not with each other person - is itself being disrespectful and ignoring their right to be free to do as they please, and it harm none.


rondiri 64M
10972 posts
5/16/2022 9:17 am

so true. I've chatted with a few novice sub/slaves who feel guilt for how they feel, usually because of their upbringing. I always tell them they have nothing to feel guilty about, they are not abnormal. They need support not ridicule.


Artschoolgrad 46M
8335 posts
5/16/2022 9:00 am

a great post!


drmgirl622 68F  
25821 posts
5/16/2022 8:14 am

So very accurate!


sletje1999 24F
132 posts
5/16/2022 5:50 am

I wholeheartedly agree. I discovered my leaning at a fairly early age, pretty much as soon as I had been getting sexually aware. And it was a very contradictory discovery. On one side it felt good to indulge into the fantasy of being tied up naked and exposed, on the other side it felt completely wrong. I was convinced to be somehow sick and distorted for having such feelings.
And it is not a topic you would just go and talk about with your parents, no matter how tolerant and open minded they are, which I have to say mine are at least to some extend. It took quite a bit of time to realize that it wasn't just me and that there were ways to live it without being condemned to hell for eternity. I also had the luck to meet someone who was neither trying to exploit it nor condemn it, but with whom I was instead able to openly and honestly discuss it. That it eventually turned into exploring it with him too, was fairly unavoidable but also a very good experience.


hardtop4you 65M

5/16/2022 4:57 am

The true souls among us
know that we didn't choose
this way, off the beaten path,
it choose us. It doesn't define
you absolutely, but it is absolute.
A submissive will is not a gift or
a weakness as a dominant will is
not a strength or entitlement . .
They are our calling. The essence
of what we are in the deepest part
of our soul. You don't have to be
righteous, but you have to fulfill
your own calling.


palinax 59M
124 posts
5/16/2022 3:02 am

Absolutely right. Submission is a truly wonderful thing


Tckg12 69M
2385 posts
5/16/2022 2:33 am

you are so right but the same is true for a male submissive too


Whynot63wow 65M

5/16/2022 1:52 am

Well said!


aliljaded 53F
8822 posts
5/16/2022 12:51 am



"Men need to hunt. She obviously understands this. She’s offering herself as prey. Not easy prey. But willing.”



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